Day 1 - Love First: Unwrapping the Gift

Love First: Unwrapping the Gift

“You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.”
Matthew 5:14-16

Are we ready for this gift? Are we ready to embrace the vision that our leadership has prayed for and studied about? Are we ready to live lives that are rooted in Love First? Are we ready to make a difference in our circle of friends, our neighborhoods, our communities, our congregation, our world? Are we ready to take Jesus and his love and let others see his light in us? What if evangelism is one of the things this world needs most? Evangelism. That’s what we’re talking about. But maybe a different concept of evangelism than you think.

In his book More Ready Than You Realize, Brian McLaren wrote this about evangelism: “On the street, evangelism is equated with pressure. It means selling God as if God were vinyl siding, replacement windows, or a mortgage refinancing service. It means shoving your ideas down someone’s throat, threatening him with hell if he does not capitulate to your logic or Scripture-quoting.” Maybe that’s the idea you have of evangelism. If so, let’s talk about a different way. Let’s talk about Love First and evangelizing like Jesus did.

McLaren continued, “If you know anything about Jesus at all, you probably know that he was an amazing conversationalist...Jesus was short on sermons, long on conversations; short on answers, long on questions; short on abstractions and propositions, long on stories and parables; short on telling you what to think, long on challenging you to think for yourself...”

In the words of Carl Medearis in his book Speaking of Jesus, “The definition of evangelism is this—be nice and talk about Jesus all the time...it’s not rocket science...”

I may not be able to quote scripture like preachers and scholars can, but I can talk about my day and how I saw Jesus work in my life that day. I can show love to those around me by showing consideration, respect, value, time, and honor. It’s the way of Love First.

Your Mission
What has God given you in abundance? Share it with someone today. Pray that God will give you that opportunity—and then watch for it.

Day 2 - Love First: Receiving the Gift of Vision

Love First: Receiving the Gift of Vision

“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be open.”
Luke 11:9-10

Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.
Psalm 119:105

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6

Receiving a gift can generate a lot of emotions, can’t it? There are gifts we don’t expect; there are gifts that touch our hearts; there are gifts that we don’t deserve; there are gifts that come with responsibilities; and there are the gifts that we get that let us know the giver knows us well and has given much thought to the gift…those are really special.

God has given our Shepherds the gift of tending our flock, our church family. He has given them a gift that comes with responsibilities. And their responsibilities include guiding us and leading us. Our Shepherds have given our ministers the gift of communicating and helping with the shepherding. That gift also has responsibilities. As the church family, we are loved so much that the gift is passed along to us, as well. This gift has responsibilities for us. God knows us well; he knows this is the perfect gift for us.

Our Shepherds want us to live that life of Love First so that as we have been loved, we will love others. It’s the gift that really does keep on giving. One of the real blessings of this gift is that the more we give away, the more we receive until we are overflowing with love for God and love for others.

No one plans to live their life in hindsight, do they? There’s that whole “hindsight is 20/20” business, right? It’s nearly impossible to move forward by looking backward. We want to do the next thing and the next thing and the next thing that God wants us to do for his kingdom. Those next things are showing and telling others what Jesus has done for us. And we can do that because we have been given so much from God that we can’t help but spill over to others.

Your Mission
Pray today that God will put someone in your path who can receive the overflow of your blessings. Determine to tell one person today what Jesus has done for you and make it happen. Be specific.

Day 3 - Love First: Giving the Gift of Vision

Love First: Giving the Gift of Vision

If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing. If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.
1 Corinthians 13:1-3 (The Message)

Love is the best gift. Love helps us see beyond the moment and into possibilities. Love makes us feel valuable and honored. We have a wonderful day we dedicate to our “Valentines.” Gifts given to us in love last forever—oh, maybe not the gift itself…but the moment lasts, the feeling lasts, and the message stays with us.

Many of us have loved ones, and we can remember the first time they told us they loved us or we told them we loved them. The future looked so dazzling. We felt that we could soar the heights and do anything because our love was so strong. What an incredible feeling! While that has lasted longer for some than others, it’s still true for the moment. God’s moment is forever. In our mutual love, we can do so much!

What if God gave you a gift—the gift of vision? What if God showed you exactly what he wanted you to do for him and for his kingdom? What if there was no guess work involved—it was spelled out plainly? Wouldn't that be the best gift ever? And what if he told you the perfect gift to give to others every single time? Wouldn't that be awesome?

Well, God has given us that gift. It is summed up like this: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” And he says it over and over in lots of different ways. Love is the answer God has been trying to give us. Love Him. Love Others.

Is God’s love more than you want? Of course not. Is it more than you want to give to someone else? That’s the real question. We can lay out missions and visions and goals, but without love they are likely to fail. The answer is Love First.

Your Mission
What are you stingy with? Is it your time, your love, your money? Something else? Be honest. Ask God to help you keep it from coming between you and him.

Day 4 - Maybe We Need to Get Over Ourselves

Maybe We Need to Get Over Ourselves

In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord, high and exalted, seated on a throne; and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him were seraphim, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling to one another:

“Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory.”

At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.

“Woe to me!” I cried. “I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord Almighty.”

Then one of the seraphim flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar. With it he touched my mouth and said, “See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for.”

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”

And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”


Isaiah 6:1-8

Sometimes we pray to God, asking him to use us in his kingdom. Then, when someone asks us to help in a ministry, we tell them, “That’s not my thing” or “I don’t like that.” That’s asking God to provide a place for you and then telling him it’s not good enough. Yikes. Choosing to live a life rooted in Love First means we serve where we are needed with a loving heart. Because it’s not about us—it’s about others. It’s about loving God and loving others. It’s not about how comfortable we are. It’s not about being with our friends. It’s not about deserving anything. It’s about loving God and loving others.

Choosing Love First is a commitment to shining like Christ to our neighbors, our co-workers, our friends, the people who serve us, the people we serve, anyone who sees us...whether we see them first or not. In fact, Love First may mean I don’t prefer something, but because it shows Christ to someone else, I’ll go ahead and do it cheerfully with a loving heart.

In the last few decades, a phrase has emerged in casual conversations that has a truthful message: Get over yourself. In order to be the aroma of Christ to others, in order to live our lives Love First, in order to show God’s love to our community/neighborhood/parish/whatever, maybe we need to get over ourselves. Maybe we need to recognize that God’s picture is bigger than my picture or your picture. And Love First will probably mean everything isn’t done my way.

But isn’t that the point? In today’s scripture reading, Isaiah realized that he would never be good enough, clean enough, whatever enough...but God sent an angel to let him know he could be enough. And when God asked for someone to take him—take his word—to others, Isaiah knew he could do it. He probably wasn't comfortable doing it. He may not have ever done it that way. But Love First helps us get over ourselves.

Your Mission
Use the phrase “Help me to get over myself” in your prayers today. Be aware of situations where you demand to get your own way.

Day 5 - Seeing the Bigger Picture

Seeing the Bigger Picture

“My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one—I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me."
John 17:20-23

“Seeing the big picture” is a phrase that was first used in the mid-20th century to refer to the main movie at a showing. It has come to mean more than that. Now it means that you need to pay attention to all of the small things to see what they add up to. If we just focus on one small piece of something, we may miss what it’s all about. There are many examples of this: factory line applications (if all you do is put on a certain bolt at the beginning of a car assembly, you may not see its importance in holding the car together); most processes that have pieces outsourced; algebra.

Jesus modeled this in his prayer in John 17. He began the chapter by praying to his Father for himself, as he was drawing nearer to the end of his time on earth. Then he prayed for his disciples, that God would protect them and continue to bless them (Jesus uses the phrase “sanctify them,” which means to set them apart). Finally, he prayed for all believers to reflect the love that God has for them as they go about their lives.

What Jesus wants is a reflection of what God wants—for us to love others as we have been loved by our heavenly Father and his Son. That love is what we are to pass on to others—not just those close to us that we like. He wants us to love others...Love First. When we practice a Love First lifestyle, we look beyond first appearances so that we can open our eyes to what Christ wants us to see. It may mean that we change our usual approach to see people with our hearts instead of just our eyes. Love First means that we think beyond this present moment.

What if we were to think of ways that our neighborhood (street, apartment building, cul-de-sac, homeowners’ association, etc.) could be better—and how we could be a loving and gentle presence there? What if we proactively decided to make a difference in the lives of people around us who aren’t able to do for themselves at the moment? Whether it’s helping elderly people on our street with yard work or repairs or helping teachers at the beginning or end of the year by carrying things in or out and taking things down or putting things up, or even spending a few minutes in the parking lot of a grocery or department store taking carts back to the store or to the corral area when people have unloaded them...it’s a Love First action that expects nothing in return but has incredible benefits for the kingdom.

Your Mission
Look for specific ways to “pay it forward” today. Do something kind for someone else without expecting anything in return.

Day 6 - Love First: Beyond Shame

Love First: Beyond Shame

At dawn he [Jesus] appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”

“No one, sir,” she said.

“Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”
John 8:2-11

We’ve talked about this before. There are always consequences to our choices. If we could remember this on the front end, we could save ourselves—in many cases—a lot of heartache and hassle. We know that this woman in the story was caught in adultery and felt shame. She was on the receiving end of some really humiliating consequences for her choices.

What about the religious leaders who brought her to Jesus? Their motives were so not pure. They thought they had righteous indignation on their side. They felt virtuous in their behaviors....on the outside. Inside, they were working every angle they could think of to trap Jesus. And while they maintained righteous indignation, their behavior was unrighteous.

Jesus saw through that...he always did. So he called them on it—not their hidden agenda—but on their own sin. Instead of making a big production about it—like they did—he quietly asked them to look inside their own hearts and determine any sin they had. Do you see the Love First response of Christ there? He didn't try to humiliate or shame these hypocrites. Instead, he asked them to examine their own hearts and lives...and if they didn't have any sin, then they could go ahead and stone her. Beginning with the oldest (and isn't that a telling thing?), they dropped their stones and left, until only Jesus and the woman remained.

How did the woman benefit by Jesus’ Love First actions? She knew she had sinned...and knew that, according to the Law, she could be punished. Jesus made a teaching moment for both the religious hypocrites and the sinful woman. How do you think the religious leaders benefited? What about any bystander—they were in the temple courts, after all? Love First responses benefit more than just the direct recipient.

Your Mission
Pray for God to help you rid yourself of any hypocrisy in your heart and in your lifestyle. He loves you and wants you—the real, imperfect you.

Day 7 - Love First: Beyond Rejection

Love First: Beyond Rejection

After this, Jesus went around in Galilee. He did not want to go about in Judea because the Jewish leaders there were looking for a way to kill him. But when the Jewish Festival of Tabernacles was near, Jesus’ brothers said to him, “Leave Galilee and go to Judea, so that your disciples there may see the works you do. No one who wants to become a public figure acts in secret. Since you are doing these things, show yourself to the world.” For even his own brothers did not believe in him.

Therefore Jesus told them, “My time is not yet here; for you any time will do. The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify that its works are evil. You go to the festival. I am not going up to this festival, because my time has not yet fully come.” After he had said this, he stayed in Galilee.

However, after his brothers had left for the festival, he went also, not publicly, but in secret. Now at the festival the Jewish leaders were watching for Jesus and asking, “Where is he?”

Among the crowds there was widespread whispering about him. Some said, “He is a good man.”

Others replied, “No, he deceives the people.” But no one would say anything publicly about him for fear of the leaders.

Not until halfway through the festival did Jesus go up to the temple courts and begin to teach. The Jews there were amazed and asked, “How did this man get such learning without having been taught?”

Jesus answered, “My teaching is not my own. It comes from the one who sent me. Anyone who chooses to do the will of God will find out whether my teaching comes from God or whether I speak on my own.
John 7:1-17

There’s no other way to put it—Jesus was rejected by his brothers. They didn't believe in him. They didn't believe he was the Messiah. (They later realized he was the Messiah, and it changed their witness.) They even suggested that he walk into danger just to prove himself.

Jesus took this rejection amazingly well. He was so focused on the mission that God had entrusted to him that he was able to go on in spite of the rejection. Don’t you wish you were that strong when it came to dealing with the challenges surrounding rejection? He didn't let their opinions of him keep him from doing what he needed to do. His Love First response to them was to not let them defeat him. He stood up for what he knew was the right thing to do. He knew that to let them harass him into going up openly to the Feast of the Tabernacles was to put others—new believers—in danger of being excommunicated from the synagogue.

So, after his brothers left for the Feast, Jesus went secretly. And, to no one’s surprise, Jesus was the topic of many whispered conversations. And, like most whispered conversations, opinions varied. People were afraid. And doesn't fear hamper our witness?

Finally, halfway through the week-long Feast, Jesus showed up at the temple, teaching openly and with authority. The Jews were amazed and questioned how he could know so much without having studied. He answered them directly by telling them that his teaching was from the One who had sent him. He reminded them that choosing to do God’s will would reassure them that the teaching came from God.

Taking his Love First mission seriously, Jesus not only overcame the rejection of his brothers, he also taught people in the temple and confronted them about rejecting others. Sometimes Love First is tough love. But it is always loving. And its benefits are boundless. Many people were led to believe by Jesus’ decision not to let rejection keep him from doing God’s will.

Your Mission
Use the phrase “I can do all things through you, Lord; you strengthen me” in your prayers today. Allow him to strengthen you.

Day 8 - Love First: Beyond Inferiority

Love First: Beyond Inferiority

The day on which this took place was a Sabbath, and so the Jews said to the man who had been healed, “It is the Sabbath; the law forbids you to carry your mat.” But he replied, “The man who made me well said to me, ‘Pick up your mat and walk.’” So they asked him, “Who is this fellow who told you to pick it up and walk?” The man who was healed had no idea who it was, for Jesus had slipped away into the crowd that was there. Later Jesus found him at the temple and said to him, “See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you.” The man went away and told the Jews that it was Jesus who had made him well.
John 5:9b-15

This is an interesting story. First, we have a man who has been an invalid for 38 years. He had never made it into the pool in all that time. When Jesus came by, he asked the man if he wanted to get well. Instead of a straight answer, the man made an excuse for not getting into the pool. Jesus’ response was to tell the man to change his ways—pick up his mat and walk. And the guy did.

You would have thought he would have engaged Jesus in a little post-healing conversation. You might have thought he would have asked Jesus who he was (and it’s a little surprising that he didn't know who Jesus was anyway). Instead, we read that he picked up his mat, as directed. Apparently, there were some Jews who took exception to the man carrying his mat. Never mind that the guy had been laying down—paralyzed—for decades. Instead of the healed man talking about what had happened, he kind of gave the equivalent of a shoulder shrug.

The next thing we read is that Jesus found the healed man at the temple—later. It doesn't tell us what the healed man did in between being healed and coming to the temple. It is enough for us to notice that Jesus told him to stop sinning...or something worse might happen to him. This man went through a change—he was healed!—but evidently, it didn't “take” on the inside. That is, until Jesus confronted him a second time at the temple.

Sometimes the challenge of dealing with feelings of inferiority can seem overwhelming. Maybe this guy thought he could just slide in under the radar instead of openly showing and sharing the benefits of what had happened. But Love First sometimes has to be firm and direct. Jesus didn't shy away from confronting the man about his sinful life. As Jesus practiced Love First, he gave the man a push to help him overcome those feelings of inferiority. And the benefits were amazing.

Your Mission
Choose to be a specific person’s encourager today. Be direct, specific, and kind as you encourage them.

Day 9 - Love First: Beyond Damage

Love First: Beyond Damage

Those tending the pigs ran off and reported this in the town and countryside, and the people went out to see what had happened. When they came to Jesus, they saw the man who had been possessed by the legion of demons, sitting there, dressed and in his right mind; and they were afraid. Those who had seen it told the people what had happened to the demon-possessed man—and told about the pigs as well. Then the people began to plead with Jesus to leave their region. As Jesus was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon-possessed begged to go with him. Jesus did not let him, but said, “Go home to your family and tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and how he has had mercy on you.” So the man went away and began to tell in the Decapolis how much Jesus had done for him. And all the people were amazed.
Mark 5:14-20

The gospels are full of parables and miracles from Jesus’ life and ministry, but this is an amazing story. This particular story stirs something in us—compassion, pity, hope. This crazy, demon-possessed man begged Jesus to help him. He knew he was damaged. He hated it. And as much as he wanted to be rid of it, he didn’t want anyone else to have to deal with it. Surely that is why he asked Jesus not to send them out of the area.

The people in the surrounding countryside and town didn’t respond the way I thought they should have. I thought they should have rejoiced that the man was healed and that the deranged lunatic would no longer be haunting their graveyard. Instead, though, they were afraid. And perhaps they were not thrilled that two thousand pigs committed swine-suicide. The pigs were obviously a source of revenue for them, and they perhaps felt they couldn’t afford any more losses like that. I’m not surprised the man wanted to go with Jesus. But that wasn’t what Love First needed him to do.

Love First needed the man to testify and witness about what Jesus had done for him. The people in Decapolis (multiple big cities) needed to see for themselves that he was no longer damaged. They needed to hear from his own mouth that Jesus had changed him. He probably got a varied response. There were likely some who couldn’t have cared less. There were likely others who were amazed and wanted to know more. There still likely others who couldn’t believe it. But there was no denying what they saw—the man was no longer demon possessed, and he was telling others how he had changed and who had changed him.

Your Mission
Identify a specific incident from your past that made you question your worth. Pray now for God to take that self-doubt away.

Day 10 - Love First: Beyond Arrogance

Love First: Beyond Arrogance

Jesus told this parable: “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’ But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’ I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”
Luke 18:9-14

Did you ever see the animated movie Despicable Me? There are a couple of different times during the movie where the main character, Gru (voiced by Steve Carell), recognizes that he needs to change something—either about himself or something he is doing. At the moment of the realization, he intones, “Light bulb” in a sing-song kind of voice. That’s seriously what the Pharisee in the parable above needed to do. He needed to take a look at the tax collector—his demeanor, his posture, his attitude—and recognize that he needed to change. Light bulb.

Suppose the Pharisee had recognized he needed to change his attitude of arrogance. How else could the scene have gone? He might have apologized to the tax collector...maybe not. Maybe he wouldn’t have broadcasted his “prayer” to everyone within earshot. He might have recognized that his arrogance didn’t practice Love First.

We know from what Jesus said the tax collector never even looked up—he never acknowledged the Pharisee. What did that communicate to the people in the temple?...to the Pharisee?...to God? Jesus also told his audience that the tax collector went home “justified before God.” And then Jesus ended his lesson with a hard truth: “For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”

If we are committed to Love First, how will it benefit us (then eventually humankind and ultimately God) to change from arrogance to humility? How can we—if we want to share Christ with someone who struggles with the challenge of arrogance—communicate the benefit of change? Love First demands we try. If we can overcome arrogance in our own lives, can we share the benefits with someone else who also struggles with this challenge? Will we dare to help them out of the overflow of our own blessings and benefits?

Your Mission
In your prayers today, use the phrase, “Father, help me to love those who are insecure and help me with my insecurity.” Treat those around you with kindness.

Day 11 - Love First: Beyond Abandonment

Love First: Beyond Abandonment

Then leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?” They came out of the town and made their way toward him.

Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony, “He told me everything I ever did.” So when the Samaritans came to him, they urged him to stay with them, and he stayed two days. And because of his words many more became believers.
John 4: 28-30, 39-42

Do you remember how this story started? This Samaritan woman came to the well to draw water around noon so that she wouldn’t have to face the other women of the town. She was somewhat of an outcast. Now, in this section, we see that she has run into town and told people—not just her friends—about her encounter with Jesus. She admitted that Jesus called her out. That impressed the people in the town to the point that they came to see and hear what Jesus had to say.

We know that Jesus told her she had to change her lifestyle. We know that he showed her a higher calling and a higher purpose that started with those changes and with the way she worshiped God. He tore down the walls of distinction between how the Jews would worship and how the Samaritans would worship by defining true worship.

She believed him. We know that as a result of her encounter with Christ, many Samaritans became believers. It’s highly likely that she also became a believer. Although the Scriptures don’t provide us with a “rest of the story,” we can imagine that she got her life together, made the changes she needed to, and as a result became a believer. Based on what happened when she talked with Jesus, we can guess that she didn’t stop talking about him, either. Her desire to share what happened to her probably ran over and into everything she said.

There is life beyond the life challenge of abandonment. Choosing to live Love First gives us the opportunity to accept the challenge, change what needs to be changed, and reap the benefits.

Your Mission
Each time you take a drink today, say a small breath prayer (something like, “Thank you for your gift of living water.”) At the end of the day, make mention of things that made you notice his living water.

Day 12 - Love First: Benefits

Love First: Benefits

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
Matthew 7:7-8

Persistence pays off. Haven’t you found that to be true? Reportedly, Thomas Edison failed at attempts to make a light bulb 10,000 times (although some sources say “only” 3,000 times). When asked about his failed attempts, his response was that he didn’t consider them to be failures. He said he had eliminated thousands of ways a light bulb wouldn’t work. Great attitude.

So far in this guide, we have looked at some challenges to living our lives Love First. We have also looked at changes that we may need to make in order to meet those challenges. Some compelling reasons to make needed changes are found in our responses to these questions:

- If I live in such a way that makes it difficult to live as a Christian (or makes it difficult for the people around me to live as Christians), do I want to change?

- How do I want or need to change?

- Am I willing to change?

- Is sharing my faith a high enough value to make a change?

Quite frankly, when most of us consider changing to a Love First lifestyle, we wonder how it will benefit our lives. Is there a reward for this type of lifestyle change? Let’s think it through. When I lead and respond with a Love First approach, I receive the blessing of knowing that what I’m doing is the right thing. I realize that I am living God’s vision for his children, rooted in Love First. It makes us feel good to do something good for someone else, right? So then, what about those who are on the receiving end of our Love First actions? They will perceive that someone cares about them. They will perceive that we think they have value. There will be some who “pay it forward” by choosing a Love First approach to someone else.

It wouldn’t take very many people “paying it forward” before the neighborhood or community would start to change, one person at a time. If people in the community begin choosing Love First, it will make a difference in our congregations, and we’ll be more consistent in choosing to Love First with our Christian brothers and sisters. One church at a time, we can make a difference in our responses to people in our cities, states, countries, and mankind in general. That all makes a difference to God. He sees his creation choosing to live under his vision rooted in Love First.

Your Mission
Make this a “count your blessings” day. Thank each person in your family (close friends, too, if your family isn’t around) for a specific blessing they bring to your life.

Day 13 - Love First: Dealing With Shame

Love First: Dealing With Shame

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground. At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there.
John 8:6-9

Do you know the difference between guilt and shame? Guilt is looking at your sin and realizing what you've done. Shame is seeing yourself as a failure because of what you've done. Think about it for a minute. Have you ever felt guilty about something you've done? What did you do about it? Most likely, you apologized to whomever you felt you might have wronged and you tried to make restitution. And then what? You repented, paid a consequence, and moved on.

Shame, on the other hand, continues to look inside. Rather than allowing yourself to be forgiven, you hold on to your feelings of guilt until the perceived problem becomes you and not the sin. That’s a simplified explanation, but the fact is, shame is destructive and debilitating. Whether you are the one fighting the challenges that shame brings or you have a relationship (casual or intimate) with someone fighting the challenge of shame, change is necessary to move forward.

Think about this adulterous woman in today’s scripture reading. She wasn't just “caught” in the act of adultery—she was dragged in front of a group of men who were intent on making sure she was punished and humiliated in public. She knew what she was doing was wrong and knew the law stated that both the man and the woman caught in adultery were to be stoned. She fully expected to be stoned.

But Jesus, recognizing the looming trap the Pharisees thought they had hidden from him, turned the tables on the religious leaders and invited them—if they were without sin—to go ahead a cast a stone. Of course, they didn't. Jesus didn't just stop there. He did not condemn the woman. He told her to change her life. That’s the Love First response.

What do you think the woman did after that? The Scriptures don’t tell us. I really want to believe that she took the chance to change her life, repented for her sins, and lived a righteous life. We’ll have to wait to ask when we get to heaven if that’s what happened. Not only was the woman told to change, but the religious leaders were also told to change. Change is difficult, but necessary.

Love First calls for change.

Your Mission
Whenever you are critical of someone today, stop and apologize for being hurtful. Restate the issue in a loving and Christ-like way.

Day 14 - Love First: Dealing with Rejection

Love First: Dealing with Rejection

Therefore Jesus told them, “My time is not yet here; for you any time will do. The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify that its works are evil. You go to the festival. I am not going up to this festival, because my time has not yet fully come.” After he had said this, he stayed in Galilee.

However, after his brothers had left for the festival, he went also, not publicly, but in secret.
John 7:6-10

Ask any young adult how it feels to get dumped by someone in a relationship. They’ll tell you it’s no picnic. Rejection can build your character and make you a stronger person, but everyone reacts to it in different ways. For some people, rejection is paralyzing. It stunts their psychological and emotional growth. It’s all in the way you process it.

We have all faced some form of rejection—exclusion, dismissal, disappointment, alienation, deficiency, disapproval—and lived through it. However, how we deal with it makes a great deal of difference. In the section of Scripture for today, and from a week ago, we saw that Jesus’ own brothers didn’t believe in him. They rejected that he was the Messiah! Go figure. But Jesus didn't let their rejection of who he was stop him from doing what God had given him to do.

There have been some notable mistakes in history that were due to someone’s rejections. In 1876, Western Union decided to reject Alexander Graham Bell’s patent on his new invention called the telephone. (Just a couple of years later, they tried to buy it for $25 million…and were rejected.) Julius Caesar rejected his wife’s pleas to stay home from the Senate on March 15 because she’d had dreams he would be killed. And in 1961, Decca Records (in London) rejected the opportunity to sign a new musical group named The Beatles.

When we are rejected, excluded, dismissed, etc., we have a choice to make right away. We can accept that rejection (we don’t have to like it!) and move on, or we can let it stop our forward progress. Acceptance requires action. It requires a very definite decision and subsequent changes in behavior. Maybe we need to ask ourselves if the rejection is actually a blessing in disguise. Maybe we need to get the opinion of someone we trust.

Whether we have been rejected or we have rejected someone else, consider what a life dedicated to Love First would do. Would Love First close the door on any further relationship? Would Love First open itself up to looking for options? The Son of God was rejected. He was even despised. He knew that his purpose and calling, rooted in God’s vision, meant that he could handle it.

Your Mission
As you pray today, use the phrase “Father, I thank you for your love and acceptance of me and all my imperfections.”

Day 15 - Love First: Dealing With Feeling Inferior

Love First: Dealing With Feeling Inferior

Some time later, Jesus went up to Jerusalem for one of the Jewish festivals. Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. Here a great number of disabled people used to lie—the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?”

“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.”

Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked.

The day on which this took place was a Sabbath, and so the Jewish leaders said to the man who had been healed, “It is the Sabbath; the law forbids you to carry your mat.”

But he replied, “The man who made me well said to me, ‘Pick up your mat and walk.’ ”

So they asked him, “Who is this fellow who told you to pick it up and walk?”

The man who was healed had no idea who it was, for Jesus had slipped away into the crowd that was there.

Later Jesus found him at the temple and said to him, “See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you.” The man went away and told the Jewish leaders that it was Jesus who had made him well.
John 5:1-15

Do you remember reading this story from a week ago? Do you remember that Jesus asked the lame man if he wanted to get well? And do you remember that the man gave Jesus an excuse? He didn’t tell Jesus, “Yes.” He didn’t answer the way I thought he should have answered. Instead, he gave Jesus an excuse...and not even a very convincing excuse at that. He blamed somebody else.

My grandmother used to use an expression that reminds me of this story. To describe someone who seemed to be sick more than well, she would sometimes say that they “enjoyed poor health.” It took me several years of hearing that and trying to puzzle it out before I got it. She meant that the person used “not feeling well” as an excuse for not being active (usually in church work). That’s what this guy reminds me of. He’d been laying there by the pool for a long time. Everyone assumed he wanted to get well. I wonder if he had wrapped his identity into being “the guy who just couldn’t make it to the pool for healing.” Jesus challenged him to change his ways. He forced him to look inside himself and make a change.

What are the changes we need to make if we are dealing with our own feelings of inferiority? This is a hard one to deal with—it gets personal quickly. If we don’t deal with those feelings, they can quickly become feelings of rejection. To determine what our own changes need to be, let’s look at what Jesus told the lame man. He told him to take action. He said, “Get up, take your bedroll, and start walking.” Action verb after action verb after action verb—get, take, start. Whether we are dealing with our own feelings of inferiority or facing someone who has feelings of inferiority, the first change we/they have to make is to go from passive to active.

Nike has made a great deal of money with their tag line “Just do it.” There is a church in downtown Atlanta that has the tag line “Love God. Love Others. Prove It.” Change requires action. Living rooted in Love First means that we love others consistently and patiently until they can take action. Love First encourages them to take that action and loves them through as many false starts as it takes. Love First means we trust in God and our love for him to make the changes we need in our own lives to combat the challenge of feelings of inferiority.

Your Mission
Make a point of saying something positive during each interaction you have today. Be sincere and kind. At the end of the day, did it make a difference?

Day 16 - Love First: Dealing With the Damage

Love First: Dealing With the Damage

When he [Legion] saw Jesus from a distance, he ran and fell on his knees in front of him. He shouted at the top of his voice, “What do you want with me, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? Swear to God that you won’t torture me!” For Jesus had said to him, “Come out of this man, you evil spirit!” Then Jesus asked him, “What is your name?” “My name is Legion,” he replied, “for we are many.” And he begged Jesus again and again not to send them out of the area. A large herd of pigs was feeding on the nearby hillside. The demons begged Jesus, “Send us among the pigs; allow us to go into them.” He gave them permission, and the evil spirits came out and went into the pigs. The herd, about two thousand in number, rushed down the steep bank into the lake and were drowned.
Mark 5:6-13

Just when you think this story can’t get worse than a damaged, demon-possessed man calling out to Jesus and begging him not to torture him, it takes a turn for the weird. The demon(s), recognizing Jesus, begged over and over not to be sent out into the area where they had been. They even went so far as to beg Jesus to cast them into a large herd of pigs nearby. Wait. What? And Jesus gave them permission! So as soon as the demons went into the pigs, they rushed down a steep bank and drowned themselves in the lake.

So what does this say to us when we are dealing with feelings of being damaged? Does it say to us that we are to find a herd of pigs and destroy ourselves? Absolutely not. The point to this has nothing to do with the demons nor the pigs. It has to do with the man. The man in the cemetery who has been crying and hurting himself. That’s where the focus is. And that’s where the change takes place. It is a change that gives us hope and comfort that we don’t have to stay damaged—or flawed, impaired, blemished, spoiled, crushed, fractured, fragmented, shattered, defective, or inadequate.

And what does this say to us when we come face to face with someone who thinks and feels that they are damaged? Choosing a Love First response means that we see beyond the surface. It says we take the time to establish a relationship that is faithful and caring and honest. The change we may need to make is an attitude adjustment first. Love First chooses to go beyond first impressions. Love First chooses to leave my comfort zone and open myself up to a different experience, a different kind of relationship. And maybe it’s one that I have to work on being comfortable with. But I do it—we do it—so that we represent Love First...the love of God...and love for others.

Your Mission
Either with your immediate family or a circle of close friends, ask each one individually how you can pray for them today. Pray about it right then.