Day 1 - Love First: Unwrapping the Gift

Love First: Unwrapping the Gift

“You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.”
Matthew 5:14-16

Are we ready for this gift? Are we ready to embrace the vision that our leadership has prayed for and studied about? Are we ready to live lives that are rooted in Love First? Are we ready to make a difference in our circle of friends, our neighborhoods, our communities, our congregation, our world? Are we ready to take Jesus and his love and let others see his light in us? What if evangelism is one of the things this world needs most? Evangelism. That’s what we’re talking about. But maybe a different concept of evangelism than you think.

In his book More Ready Than You Realize, Brian McLaren wrote this about evangelism: “On the street, evangelism is equated with pressure. It means selling God as if God were vinyl siding, replacement windows, or a mortgage refinancing service. It means shoving your ideas down someone’s throat, threatening him with hell if he does not capitulate to your logic or Scripture-quoting.” Maybe that’s the idea you have of evangelism. If so, let’s talk about a different way. Let’s talk about Love First and evangelizing like Jesus did.

McLaren continued, “If you know anything about Jesus at all, you probably know that he was an amazing conversationalist...Jesus was short on sermons, long on conversations; short on answers, long on questions; short on abstractions and propositions, long on stories and parables; short on telling you what to think, long on challenging you to think for yourself...”

In the words of Carl Medearis in his book Speaking of Jesus, “The definition of evangelism is this—be nice and talk about Jesus all the time...it’s not rocket science...”

I may not be able to quote scripture like preachers and scholars can, but I can talk about my day and how I saw Jesus work in my life that day. I can show love to those around me by showing consideration, respect, value, time, and honor. It’s the way of Love First.

Your Mission
What has God given you in abundance? Share it with someone today. Pray that God will give you that opportunity—and then watch for it.

Day 2 - Love First: Receiving the Gift of Vision

Love First: Receiving the Gift of Vision

“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be open.”
Luke 11:9-10

Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.
Psalm 119:105

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6

Receiving a gift can generate a lot of emotions, can’t it? There are gifts we don’t expect; there are gifts that touch our hearts; there are gifts that we don’t deserve; there are gifts that come with responsibilities; and there are the gifts that we get that let us know the giver knows us well and has given much thought to the gift…those are really special.

God has given our Shepherds the gift of tending our flock, our church family. He has given them a gift that comes with responsibilities. And their responsibilities include guiding us and leading us. Our Shepherds have given our ministers the gift of communicating and helping with the shepherding. That gift also has responsibilities. As the church family, we are loved so much that the gift is passed along to us, as well. This gift has responsibilities for us. God knows us well; he knows this is the perfect gift for us.

Our Shepherds want us to live that life of Love First so that as we have been loved, we will love others. It’s the gift that really does keep on giving. One of the real blessings of this gift is that the more we give away, the more we receive until we are overflowing with love for God and love for others.

No one plans to live their life in hindsight, do they? There’s that whole “hindsight is 20/20” business, right? It’s nearly impossible to move forward by looking backward. We want to do the next thing and the next thing and the next thing that God wants us to do for his kingdom. Those next things are showing and telling others what Jesus has done for us. And we can do that because we have been given so much from God that we can’t help but spill over to others.

Your Mission
Pray today that God will put someone in your path who can receive the overflow of your blessings. Determine to tell one person today what Jesus has done for you and make it happen. Be specific.

Day 3 - Love First: Giving the Gift of Vision

Love First: Giving the Gift of Vision

If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing. If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.
1 Corinthians 13:1-3 (The Message)

Love is the best gift. Love helps us see beyond the moment and into possibilities. Love makes us feel valuable and honored. We have a wonderful day we dedicate to our “Valentines.” Gifts given to us in love last forever—oh, maybe not the gift itself…but the moment lasts, the feeling lasts, and the message stays with us.

Many of us have loved ones, and we can remember the first time they told us they loved us or we told them we loved them. The future looked so dazzling. We felt that we could soar the heights and do anything because our love was so strong. What an incredible feeling! While that has lasted longer for some than others, it’s still true for the moment. God’s moment is forever. In our mutual love, we can do so much!

What if God gave you a gift—the gift of vision? What if God showed you exactly what he wanted you to do for him and for his kingdom? What if there was no guess work involved—it was spelled out plainly? Wouldn't that be the best gift ever? And what if he told you the perfect gift to give to others every single time? Wouldn't that be awesome?

Well, God has given us that gift. It is summed up like this: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” And he says it over and over in lots of different ways. Love is the answer God has been trying to give us. Love Him. Love Others.

Is God’s love more than you want? Of course not. Is it more than you want to give to someone else? That’s the real question. We can lay out missions and visions and goals, but without love they are likely to fail. The answer is Love First.

Your Mission
What are you stingy with? Is it your time, your love, your money? Something else? Be honest. Ask God to help you keep it from coming between you and him.

Day 4 - Maybe We Need to Get Over Ourselves

Maybe We Need to Get Over Ourselves

In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord, high and exalted, seated on a throne; and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him were seraphim, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling to one another:

“Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory.”

At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.

“Woe to me!” I cried. “I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord Almighty.”

Then one of the seraphim flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar. With it he touched my mouth and said, “See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for.”

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”

And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”


Isaiah 6:1-8

Sometimes we pray to God, asking him to use us in his kingdom. Then, when someone asks us to help in a ministry, we tell them, “That’s not my thing” or “I don’t like that.” That’s asking God to provide a place for you and then telling him it’s not good enough. Yikes. Choosing to live a life rooted in Love First means we serve where we are needed with a loving heart. Because it’s not about us—it’s about others. It’s about loving God and loving others. It’s not about how comfortable we are. It’s not about being with our friends. It’s not about deserving anything. It’s about loving God and loving others.

Choosing Love First is a commitment to shining like Christ to our neighbors, our co-workers, our friends, the people who serve us, the people we serve, anyone who sees us...whether we see them first or not. In fact, Love First may mean I don’t prefer something, but because it shows Christ to someone else, I’ll go ahead and do it cheerfully with a loving heart.

In the last few decades, a phrase has emerged in casual conversations that has a truthful message: Get over yourself. In order to be the aroma of Christ to others, in order to live our lives Love First, in order to show God’s love to our community/neighborhood/parish/whatever, maybe we need to get over ourselves. Maybe we need to recognize that God’s picture is bigger than my picture or your picture. And Love First will probably mean everything isn’t done my way.

But isn’t that the point? In today’s scripture reading, Isaiah realized that he would never be good enough, clean enough, whatever enough...but God sent an angel to let him know he could be enough. And when God asked for someone to take him—take his word—to others, Isaiah knew he could do it. He probably wasn't comfortable doing it. He may not have ever done it that way. But Love First helps us get over ourselves.

Your Mission
Use the phrase “Help me to get over myself” in your prayers today. Be aware of situations where you demand to get your own way.

Day 5 - Seeing the Bigger Picture

Seeing the Bigger Picture

“My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one—I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me."
John 17:20-23

“Seeing the big picture” is a phrase that was first used in the mid-20th century to refer to the main movie at a showing. It has come to mean more than that. Now it means that you need to pay attention to all of the small things to see what they add up to. If we just focus on one small piece of something, we may miss what it’s all about. There are many examples of this: factory line applications (if all you do is put on a certain bolt at the beginning of a car assembly, you may not see its importance in holding the car together); most processes that have pieces outsourced; algebra.

Jesus modeled this in his prayer in John 17. He began the chapter by praying to his Father for himself, as he was drawing nearer to the end of his time on earth. Then he prayed for his disciples, that God would protect them and continue to bless them (Jesus uses the phrase “sanctify them,” which means to set them apart). Finally, he prayed for all believers to reflect the love that God has for them as they go about their lives.

What Jesus wants is a reflection of what God wants—for us to love others as we have been loved by our heavenly Father and his Son. That love is what we are to pass on to others—not just those close to us that we like. He wants us to love others...Love First. When we practice a Love First lifestyle, we look beyond first appearances so that we can open our eyes to what Christ wants us to see. It may mean that we change our usual approach to see people with our hearts instead of just our eyes. Love First means that we think beyond this present moment.

What if we were to think of ways that our neighborhood (street, apartment building, cul-de-sac, homeowners’ association, etc.) could be better—and how we could be a loving and gentle presence there? What if we proactively decided to make a difference in the lives of people around us who aren’t able to do for themselves at the moment? Whether it’s helping elderly people on our street with yard work or repairs or helping teachers at the beginning or end of the year by carrying things in or out and taking things down or putting things up, or even spending a few minutes in the parking lot of a grocery or department store taking carts back to the store or to the corral area when people have unloaded them...it’s a Love First action that expects nothing in return but has incredible benefits for the kingdom.

Your Mission
Look for specific ways to “pay it forward” today. Do something kind for someone else without expecting anything in return.

Day 6 - Love First: Beyond Shame

Love First: Beyond Shame

At dawn he [Jesus] appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”

“No one, sir,” she said.

“Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”
John 8:2-11

We’ve talked about this before. There are always consequences to our choices. If we could remember this on the front end, we could save ourselves—in many cases—a lot of heartache and hassle. We know that this woman in the story was caught in adultery and felt shame. She was on the receiving end of some really humiliating consequences for her choices.

What about the religious leaders who brought her to Jesus? Their motives were so not pure. They thought they had righteous indignation on their side. They felt virtuous in their behaviors....on the outside. Inside, they were working every angle they could think of to trap Jesus. And while they maintained righteous indignation, their behavior was unrighteous.

Jesus saw through that...he always did. So he called them on it—not their hidden agenda—but on their own sin. Instead of making a big production about it—like they did—he quietly asked them to look inside their own hearts and determine any sin they had. Do you see the Love First response of Christ there? He didn't try to humiliate or shame these hypocrites. Instead, he asked them to examine their own hearts and lives...and if they didn't have any sin, then they could go ahead and stone her. Beginning with the oldest (and isn't that a telling thing?), they dropped their stones and left, until only Jesus and the woman remained.

How did the woman benefit by Jesus’ Love First actions? She knew she had sinned...and knew that, according to the Law, she could be punished. Jesus made a teaching moment for both the religious hypocrites and the sinful woman. How do you think the religious leaders benefited? What about any bystander—they were in the temple courts, after all? Love First responses benefit more than just the direct recipient.

Your Mission
Pray for God to help you rid yourself of any hypocrisy in your heart and in your lifestyle. He loves you and wants you—the real, imperfect you.

Day 7 - Love First: Beyond Rejection

Love First: Beyond Rejection

After this, Jesus went around in Galilee. He did not want to go about in Judea because the Jewish leaders there were looking for a way to kill him. But when the Jewish Festival of Tabernacles was near, Jesus’ brothers said to him, “Leave Galilee and go to Judea, so that your disciples there may see the works you do. No one who wants to become a public figure acts in secret. Since you are doing these things, show yourself to the world.” For even his own brothers did not believe in him.

Therefore Jesus told them, “My time is not yet here; for you any time will do. The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify that its works are evil. You go to the festival. I am not going up to this festival, because my time has not yet fully come.” After he had said this, he stayed in Galilee.

However, after his brothers had left for the festival, he went also, not publicly, but in secret. Now at the festival the Jewish leaders were watching for Jesus and asking, “Where is he?”

Among the crowds there was widespread whispering about him. Some said, “He is a good man.”

Others replied, “No, he deceives the people.” But no one would say anything publicly about him for fear of the leaders.

Not until halfway through the festival did Jesus go up to the temple courts and begin to teach. The Jews there were amazed and asked, “How did this man get such learning without having been taught?”

Jesus answered, “My teaching is not my own. It comes from the one who sent me. Anyone who chooses to do the will of God will find out whether my teaching comes from God or whether I speak on my own.
John 7:1-17

There’s no other way to put it—Jesus was rejected by his brothers. They didn't believe in him. They didn't believe he was the Messiah. (They later realized he was the Messiah, and it changed their witness.) They even suggested that he walk into danger just to prove himself.

Jesus took this rejection amazingly well. He was so focused on the mission that God had entrusted to him that he was able to go on in spite of the rejection. Don’t you wish you were that strong when it came to dealing with the challenges surrounding rejection? He didn't let their opinions of him keep him from doing what he needed to do. His Love First response to them was to not let them defeat him. He stood up for what he knew was the right thing to do. He knew that to let them harass him into going up openly to the Feast of the Tabernacles was to put others—new believers—in danger of being excommunicated from the synagogue.

So, after his brothers left for the Feast, Jesus went secretly. And, to no one’s surprise, Jesus was the topic of many whispered conversations. And, like most whispered conversations, opinions varied. People were afraid. And doesn't fear hamper our witness?

Finally, halfway through the week-long Feast, Jesus showed up at the temple, teaching openly and with authority. The Jews were amazed and questioned how he could know so much without having studied. He answered them directly by telling them that his teaching was from the One who had sent him. He reminded them that choosing to do God’s will would reassure them that the teaching came from God.

Taking his Love First mission seriously, Jesus not only overcame the rejection of his brothers, he also taught people in the temple and confronted them about rejecting others. Sometimes Love First is tough love. But it is always loving. And its benefits are boundless. Many people were led to believe by Jesus’ decision not to let rejection keep him from doing God’s will.

Your Mission
Use the phrase “I can do all things through you, Lord; you strengthen me” in your prayers today. Allow him to strengthen you.

Day 8 - Love First: Beyond Inferiority

Love First: Beyond Inferiority

The day on which this took place was a Sabbath, and so the Jews said to the man who had been healed, “It is the Sabbath; the law forbids you to carry your mat.” But he replied, “The man who made me well said to me, ‘Pick up your mat and walk.’” So they asked him, “Who is this fellow who told you to pick it up and walk?” The man who was healed had no idea who it was, for Jesus had slipped away into the crowd that was there. Later Jesus found him at the temple and said to him, “See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you.” The man went away and told the Jews that it was Jesus who had made him well.
John 5:9b-15

This is an interesting story. First, we have a man who has been an invalid for 38 years. He had never made it into the pool in all that time. When Jesus came by, he asked the man if he wanted to get well. Instead of a straight answer, the man made an excuse for not getting into the pool. Jesus’ response was to tell the man to change his ways—pick up his mat and walk. And the guy did.

You would have thought he would have engaged Jesus in a little post-healing conversation. You might have thought he would have asked Jesus who he was (and it’s a little surprising that he didn't know who Jesus was anyway). Instead, we read that he picked up his mat, as directed. Apparently, there were some Jews who took exception to the man carrying his mat. Never mind that the guy had been laying down—paralyzed—for decades. Instead of the healed man talking about what had happened, he kind of gave the equivalent of a shoulder shrug.

The next thing we read is that Jesus found the healed man at the temple—later. It doesn't tell us what the healed man did in between being healed and coming to the temple. It is enough for us to notice that Jesus told him to stop sinning...or something worse might happen to him. This man went through a change—he was healed!—but evidently, it didn't “take” on the inside. That is, until Jesus confronted him a second time at the temple.

Sometimes the challenge of dealing with feelings of inferiority can seem overwhelming. Maybe this guy thought he could just slide in under the radar instead of openly showing and sharing the benefits of what had happened. But Love First sometimes has to be firm and direct. Jesus didn't shy away from confronting the man about his sinful life. As Jesus practiced Love First, he gave the man a push to help him overcome those feelings of inferiority. And the benefits were amazing.

Your Mission
Choose to be a specific person’s encourager today. Be direct, specific, and kind as you encourage them.

Day 9 - Love First: Beyond Damage

Love First: Beyond Damage

Those tending the pigs ran off and reported this in the town and countryside, and the people went out to see what had happened. When they came to Jesus, they saw the man who had been possessed by the legion of demons, sitting there, dressed and in his right mind; and they were afraid. Those who had seen it told the people what had happened to the demon-possessed man—and told about the pigs as well. Then the people began to plead with Jesus to leave their region. As Jesus was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon-possessed begged to go with him. Jesus did not let him, but said, “Go home to your family and tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and how he has had mercy on you.” So the man went away and began to tell in the Decapolis how much Jesus had done for him. And all the people were amazed.
Mark 5:14-20

The gospels are full of parables and miracles from Jesus’ life and ministry, but this is an amazing story. This particular story stirs something in us—compassion, pity, hope. This crazy, demon-possessed man begged Jesus to help him. He knew he was damaged. He hated it. And as much as he wanted to be rid of it, he didn’t want anyone else to have to deal with it. Surely that is why he asked Jesus not to send them out of the area.

The people in the surrounding countryside and town didn’t respond the way I thought they should have. I thought they should have rejoiced that the man was healed and that the deranged lunatic would no longer be haunting their graveyard. Instead, though, they were afraid. And perhaps they were not thrilled that two thousand pigs committed swine-suicide. The pigs were obviously a source of revenue for them, and they perhaps felt they couldn’t afford any more losses like that. I’m not surprised the man wanted to go with Jesus. But that wasn’t what Love First needed him to do.

Love First needed the man to testify and witness about what Jesus had done for him. The people in Decapolis (multiple big cities) needed to see for themselves that he was no longer damaged. They needed to hear from his own mouth that Jesus had changed him. He probably got a varied response. There were likely some who couldn’t have cared less. There were likely others who were amazed and wanted to know more. There still likely others who couldn’t believe it. But there was no denying what they saw—the man was no longer demon possessed, and he was telling others how he had changed and who had changed him.

Your Mission
Identify a specific incident from your past that made you question your worth. Pray now for God to take that self-doubt away.

Day 10 - Love First: Beyond Arrogance

Love First: Beyond Arrogance

Jesus told this parable: “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’ But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’ I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”
Luke 18:9-14

Did you ever see the animated movie Despicable Me? There are a couple of different times during the movie where the main character, Gru (voiced by Steve Carell), recognizes that he needs to change something—either about himself or something he is doing. At the moment of the realization, he intones, “Light bulb” in a sing-song kind of voice. That’s seriously what the Pharisee in the parable above needed to do. He needed to take a look at the tax collector—his demeanor, his posture, his attitude—and recognize that he needed to change. Light bulb.

Suppose the Pharisee had recognized he needed to change his attitude of arrogance. How else could the scene have gone? He might have apologized to the tax collector...maybe not. Maybe he wouldn’t have broadcasted his “prayer” to everyone within earshot. He might have recognized that his arrogance didn’t practice Love First.

We know from what Jesus said the tax collector never even looked up—he never acknowledged the Pharisee. What did that communicate to the people in the temple?...to the Pharisee?...to God? Jesus also told his audience that the tax collector went home “justified before God.” And then Jesus ended his lesson with a hard truth: “For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”

If we are committed to Love First, how will it benefit us (then eventually humankind and ultimately God) to change from arrogance to humility? How can we—if we want to share Christ with someone who struggles with the challenge of arrogance—communicate the benefit of change? Love First demands we try. If we can overcome arrogance in our own lives, can we share the benefits with someone else who also struggles with this challenge? Will we dare to help them out of the overflow of our own blessings and benefits?

Your Mission
In your prayers today, use the phrase, “Father, help me to love those who are insecure and help me with my insecurity.” Treat those around you with kindness.

Day 11 - Love First: Beyond Abandonment

Love First: Beyond Abandonment

Then leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?” They came out of the town and made their way toward him.

Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony, “He told me everything I ever did.” So when the Samaritans came to him, they urged him to stay with them, and he stayed two days. And because of his words many more became believers.
John 4: 28-30, 39-42

Do you remember how this story started? This Samaritan woman came to the well to draw water around noon so that she wouldn’t have to face the other women of the town. She was somewhat of an outcast. Now, in this section, we see that she has run into town and told people—not just her friends—about her encounter with Jesus. She admitted that Jesus called her out. That impressed the people in the town to the point that they came to see and hear what Jesus had to say.

We know that Jesus told her she had to change her lifestyle. We know that he showed her a higher calling and a higher purpose that started with those changes and with the way she worshiped God. He tore down the walls of distinction between how the Jews would worship and how the Samaritans would worship by defining true worship.

She believed him. We know that as a result of her encounter with Christ, many Samaritans became believers. It’s highly likely that she also became a believer. Although the Scriptures don’t provide us with a “rest of the story,” we can imagine that she got her life together, made the changes she needed to, and as a result became a believer. Based on what happened when she talked with Jesus, we can guess that she didn’t stop talking about him, either. Her desire to share what happened to her probably ran over and into everything she said.

There is life beyond the life challenge of abandonment. Choosing to live Love First gives us the opportunity to accept the challenge, change what needs to be changed, and reap the benefits.

Your Mission
Each time you take a drink today, say a small breath prayer (something like, “Thank you for your gift of living water.”) At the end of the day, make mention of things that made you notice his living water.

Day 12 - Love First: Benefits

Love First: Benefits

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
Matthew 7:7-8

Persistence pays off. Haven’t you found that to be true? Reportedly, Thomas Edison failed at attempts to make a light bulb 10,000 times (although some sources say “only” 3,000 times). When asked about his failed attempts, his response was that he didn’t consider them to be failures. He said he had eliminated thousands of ways a light bulb wouldn’t work. Great attitude.

So far in this guide, we have looked at some challenges to living our lives Love First. We have also looked at changes that we may need to make in order to meet those challenges. Some compelling reasons to make needed changes are found in our responses to these questions:

- If I live in such a way that makes it difficult to live as a Christian (or makes it difficult for the people around me to live as Christians), do I want to change?

- How do I want or need to change?

- Am I willing to change?

- Is sharing my faith a high enough value to make a change?

Quite frankly, when most of us consider changing to a Love First lifestyle, we wonder how it will benefit our lives. Is there a reward for this type of lifestyle change? Let’s think it through. When I lead and respond with a Love First approach, I receive the blessing of knowing that what I’m doing is the right thing. I realize that I am living God’s vision for his children, rooted in Love First. It makes us feel good to do something good for someone else, right? So then, what about those who are on the receiving end of our Love First actions? They will perceive that someone cares about them. They will perceive that we think they have value. There will be some who “pay it forward” by choosing a Love First approach to someone else.

It wouldn’t take very many people “paying it forward” before the neighborhood or community would start to change, one person at a time. If people in the community begin choosing Love First, it will make a difference in our congregations, and we’ll be more consistent in choosing to Love First with our Christian brothers and sisters. One church at a time, we can make a difference in our responses to people in our cities, states, countries, and mankind in general. That all makes a difference to God. He sees his creation choosing to live under his vision rooted in Love First.

Your Mission
Make this a “count your blessings” day. Thank each person in your family (close friends, too, if your family isn’t around) for a specific blessing they bring to your life.

Day 13 - Love First: Dealing With Shame

Love First: Dealing With Shame

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground. At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there.
John 8:6-9

Do you know the difference between guilt and shame? Guilt is looking at your sin and realizing what you've done. Shame is seeing yourself as a failure because of what you've done. Think about it for a minute. Have you ever felt guilty about something you've done? What did you do about it? Most likely, you apologized to whomever you felt you might have wronged and you tried to make restitution. And then what? You repented, paid a consequence, and moved on.

Shame, on the other hand, continues to look inside. Rather than allowing yourself to be forgiven, you hold on to your feelings of guilt until the perceived problem becomes you and not the sin. That’s a simplified explanation, but the fact is, shame is destructive and debilitating. Whether you are the one fighting the challenges that shame brings or you have a relationship (casual or intimate) with someone fighting the challenge of shame, change is necessary to move forward.

Think about this adulterous woman in today’s scripture reading. She wasn't just “caught” in the act of adultery—she was dragged in front of a group of men who were intent on making sure she was punished and humiliated in public. She knew what she was doing was wrong and knew the law stated that both the man and the woman caught in adultery were to be stoned. She fully expected to be stoned.

But Jesus, recognizing the looming trap the Pharisees thought they had hidden from him, turned the tables on the religious leaders and invited them—if they were without sin—to go ahead a cast a stone. Of course, they didn't. Jesus didn't just stop there. He did not condemn the woman. He told her to change her life. That’s the Love First response.

What do you think the woman did after that? The Scriptures don’t tell us. I really want to believe that she took the chance to change her life, repented for her sins, and lived a righteous life. We’ll have to wait to ask when we get to heaven if that’s what happened. Not only was the woman told to change, but the religious leaders were also told to change. Change is difficult, but necessary.

Love First calls for change.

Your Mission
Whenever you are critical of someone today, stop and apologize for being hurtful. Restate the issue in a loving and Christ-like way.

Day 14 - Love First: Dealing with Rejection

Love First: Dealing with Rejection

Therefore Jesus told them, “My time is not yet here; for you any time will do. The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify that its works are evil. You go to the festival. I am not going up to this festival, because my time has not yet fully come.” After he had said this, he stayed in Galilee.

However, after his brothers had left for the festival, he went also, not publicly, but in secret.
John 7:6-10

Ask any young adult how it feels to get dumped by someone in a relationship. They’ll tell you it’s no picnic. Rejection can build your character and make you a stronger person, but everyone reacts to it in different ways. For some people, rejection is paralyzing. It stunts their psychological and emotional growth. It’s all in the way you process it.

We have all faced some form of rejection—exclusion, dismissal, disappointment, alienation, deficiency, disapproval—and lived through it. However, how we deal with it makes a great deal of difference. In the section of Scripture for today, and from a week ago, we saw that Jesus’ own brothers didn’t believe in him. They rejected that he was the Messiah! Go figure. But Jesus didn't let their rejection of who he was stop him from doing what God had given him to do.

There have been some notable mistakes in history that were due to someone’s rejections. In 1876, Western Union decided to reject Alexander Graham Bell’s patent on his new invention called the telephone. (Just a couple of years later, they tried to buy it for $25 million…and were rejected.) Julius Caesar rejected his wife’s pleas to stay home from the Senate on March 15 because she’d had dreams he would be killed. And in 1961, Decca Records (in London) rejected the opportunity to sign a new musical group named The Beatles.

When we are rejected, excluded, dismissed, etc., we have a choice to make right away. We can accept that rejection (we don’t have to like it!) and move on, or we can let it stop our forward progress. Acceptance requires action. It requires a very definite decision and subsequent changes in behavior. Maybe we need to ask ourselves if the rejection is actually a blessing in disguise. Maybe we need to get the opinion of someone we trust.

Whether we have been rejected or we have rejected someone else, consider what a life dedicated to Love First would do. Would Love First close the door on any further relationship? Would Love First open itself up to looking for options? The Son of God was rejected. He was even despised. He knew that his purpose and calling, rooted in God’s vision, meant that he could handle it.

Your Mission
As you pray today, use the phrase “Father, I thank you for your love and acceptance of me and all my imperfections.”

Day 15 - Love First: Dealing With Feeling Inferior

Love First: Dealing With Feeling Inferior

Some time later, Jesus went up to Jerusalem for one of the Jewish festivals. Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. Here a great number of disabled people used to lie—the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?”

“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.”

Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked.

The day on which this took place was a Sabbath, and so the Jewish leaders said to the man who had been healed, “It is the Sabbath; the law forbids you to carry your mat.”

But he replied, “The man who made me well said to me, ‘Pick up your mat and walk.’ ”

So they asked him, “Who is this fellow who told you to pick it up and walk?”

The man who was healed had no idea who it was, for Jesus had slipped away into the crowd that was there.

Later Jesus found him at the temple and said to him, “See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you.” The man went away and told the Jewish leaders that it was Jesus who had made him well.
John 5:1-15

Do you remember reading this story from a week ago? Do you remember that Jesus asked the lame man if he wanted to get well? And do you remember that the man gave Jesus an excuse? He didn’t tell Jesus, “Yes.” He didn’t answer the way I thought he should have answered. Instead, he gave Jesus an excuse...and not even a very convincing excuse at that. He blamed somebody else.

My grandmother used to use an expression that reminds me of this story. To describe someone who seemed to be sick more than well, she would sometimes say that they “enjoyed poor health.” It took me several years of hearing that and trying to puzzle it out before I got it. She meant that the person used “not feeling well” as an excuse for not being active (usually in church work). That’s what this guy reminds me of. He’d been laying there by the pool for a long time. Everyone assumed he wanted to get well. I wonder if he had wrapped his identity into being “the guy who just couldn’t make it to the pool for healing.” Jesus challenged him to change his ways. He forced him to look inside himself and make a change.

What are the changes we need to make if we are dealing with our own feelings of inferiority? This is a hard one to deal with—it gets personal quickly. If we don’t deal with those feelings, they can quickly become feelings of rejection. To determine what our own changes need to be, let’s look at what Jesus told the lame man. He told him to take action. He said, “Get up, take your bedroll, and start walking.” Action verb after action verb after action verb—get, take, start. Whether we are dealing with our own feelings of inferiority or facing someone who has feelings of inferiority, the first change we/they have to make is to go from passive to active.

Nike has made a great deal of money with their tag line “Just do it.” There is a church in downtown Atlanta that has the tag line “Love God. Love Others. Prove It.” Change requires action. Living rooted in Love First means that we love others consistently and patiently until they can take action. Love First encourages them to take that action and loves them through as many false starts as it takes. Love First means we trust in God and our love for him to make the changes we need in our own lives to combat the challenge of feelings of inferiority.

Your Mission
Make a point of saying something positive during each interaction you have today. Be sincere and kind. At the end of the day, did it make a difference?

Day 16 - Love First: Dealing With the Damage

Love First: Dealing With the Damage

When he [Legion] saw Jesus from a distance, he ran and fell on his knees in front of him. He shouted at the top of his voice, “What do you want with me, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? Swear to God that you won’t torture me!” For Jesus had said to him, “Come out of this man, you evil spirit!” Then Jesus asked him, “What is your name?” “My name is Legion,” he replied, “for we are many.” And he begged Jesus again and again not to send them out of the area. A large herd of pigs was feeding on the nearby hillside. The demons begged Jesus, “Send us among the pigs; allow us to go into them.” He gave them permission, and the evil spirits came out and went into the pigs. The herd, about two thousand in number, rushed down the steep bank into the lake and were drowned.
Mark 5:6-13

Just when you think this story can’t get worse than a damaged, demon-possessed man calling out to Jesus and begging him not to torture him, it takes a turn for the weird. The demon(s), recognizing Jesus, begged over and over not to be sent out into the area where they had been. They even went so far as to beg Jesus to cast them into a large herd of pigs nearby. Wait. What? And Jesus gave them permission! So as soon as the demons went into the pigs, they rushed down a steep bank and drowned themselves in the lake.

So what does this say to us when we are dealing with feelings of being damaged? Does it say to us that we are to find a herd of pigs and destroy ourselves? Absolutely not. The point to this has nothing to do with the demons nor the pigs. It has to do with the man. The man in the cemetery who has been crying and hurting himself. That’s where the focus is. And that’s where the change takes place. It is a change that gives us hope and comfort that we don’t have to stay damaged—or flawed, impaired, blemished, spoiled, crushed, fractured, fragmented, shattered, defective, or inadequate.

And what does this say to us when we come face to face with someone who thinks and feels that they are damaged? Choosing a Love First response means that we see beyond the surface. It says we take the time to establish a relationship that is faithful and caring and honest. The change we may need to make is an attitude adjustment first. Love First chooses to go beyond first impressions. Love First chooses to leave my comfort zone and open myself up to a different experience, a different kind of relationship. And maybe it’s one that I have to work on being comfortable with. But I do it—we do it—so that we represent Love First...the love of God...and love for others.

Your Mission
Either with your immediate family or a circle of close friends, ask each one individually how you can pray for them today. Pray about it right then.

Day 17 - Love First: Dealing with Arrogance

Love First: Dealing with Arrogance

To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’ But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’
Luke 18:9-13

Arrogance is tough to be around. We have many sayings about people who are arrogant—usually it involves them getting what they have coming to them, right? Sayings like, “Pride goes before a fall” or “How the mighty have fallen!” are just a couple of them. Remember the other faces of arrogance—aloofness, disdain, egotism, pretension, vanity, haughtiness, self-importance, pride—and how we can view them as desirable attributes? That seems to be what the Pharisee had done.

What if you worked with, lived with, or were friends with someone who was arrogant but didn’t seem to realize it? How might you deal with that? We are talking about working Love First in order to effect a change. Where would you even start to introduce the concept of change? A steady diet of being around someone who is arrogant has a way of beating you down.

Love First as a response and a way of life gives this person the benefit of the doubt as a first step. Love First as a way of life tries to understand why this person is the way they are. Many times, arrogance is used to cover up feelings of insecurity. Understanding another person is very often the best thing we can do for them...and for ourselves!

Love First is loving God and loving others. Sometimes that just takes a while. Perhaps the best change we can make in dealing with the challenges brought on by arrogance is to just be warm and friendly and caring...and give the relationship some time.

Perhaps the biggest change we need to make has to do with what’s inside of us. We need to know who we are, know whose we are, and be happy with ourselves.

Your Mission
Cut somebody some slack today. When you become irritated, check your own attitude to be sure it isn’t arrogance talking.

Day 18 - Love First: Dealing With Abandonment

Love First: Dealing With Abandonment

The Samaritan woman said to him, “You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?” (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans)

Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”

“Sir,” the woman said, “you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his livestock?”

Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, 14 but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.”
John 4:9-15

When Jesus asked the woman to give him a drink, little did she realize how her life would change. She thought they were talking about physical thirst, but Jesus was talking about spiritual thirst. Still, you have to follow her line of thinking:

1. If she drank the water Jesus gave her, she wouldn’t have to come back to the well.

2. If she didn’t have to come back to the well, she wouldn’t have to schedule her water drawing so that she avoided the other women.

3. If she didn’t have to schedule differently to avoid others, life would be better.

She was interested because she thought it would make her life easier.

When we have run into the challenges associated with abandonment (remember these other related issues: desertion, invalidation, withdrawal, cast off), it is often our first impulse just to do whatever is the least hassle. The least hassle is most often the least effective. We have to acknowledge our feelings of abandonment or acknowledge another person’s feeling of abandonment. Once those feelings are acknowledged, we must do something...we must act. Most often we choose to overcompensate by joining everything so that we don’t have to deal with the feelings we might have if we aren’t included.

What changes did the Samaritan woman have to make? Jesus let her know that she needed to quit living the life she was currently living—one of sin. He told her that she was to follow what the Messiah said—and that he is the Messiah! Do you wonder whether or not she did as he said? What changes do you think she made? Jesus talked to her about what true worship is. If he told her what she was doing, and then he told her what she needed to be doing, don’t you think she made those changes? It wouldn’t necessarily mean that she wouldn’t continue to face challenges, but he was giving her what she needed to make the changes she needed to meet those challenges.

Your Mission
Name one or two practices you have that you are resistant to change. Ask someone close to you if their life would be better if you did change. Pray about it together.

Day 19 - Love First: Changes

Love First: Changes

At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” He called a little child and had him stand among them. And he said: “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”
Matthew 18:1-4

If we only look at the challenges to living a life that is rooted in Love First, we may not be convinced of how important a vision it is. Because to look at challenges and want to surmount them is to admit that we may need to make some changes, and change scares us. (Fear of the unknown is in that Top 10...)

In her online article on “How to Deal With Change,” life coach Terri Babers reminds us that change is always coming...and whether you look forward to it with anticipation or dread, it can be stressful. One of the biggest things we can do to prepare ourselves for making changes is to adjust our thinking. Attitude plays a huge part in dealing with challenges and with the changes they bring. Some steps to help us deal with change include:

- Simply notice that it is happening. Don’t try to run and hide.

- Face your feelings about the changes needed. Get past “Why me?” and “I don’t want to!” and “This isn’t fair!” Figure out your fears and face them.

- Determine whether or not the change is something you are willing to do. Don’t say you’re willing when you aren’t.

- Adopt an attitude of grateful anticipation. Know that God is in control and you have made the decision to live out his vision.

- Choose your thoughts and attitudes for each change. Negative thoughts block creativity and problem-solving. Positive thoughts build bridges to opportunities and possibilities.

- Learn to relax (more). Relaxation helps us deal with change.

- Set your goals in such a way that you can consciously guide the change.

God’s vision for Christ, and for us, is to love God and love others. Our lives need to be conscious of that all of the time. Choosing to live under that vision of Love First helps us to make any changes we may need to make to deal with the challenges that will come.

Your Mission
Pray the Serenity prayer today. “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”

Day 20 - Love First: In the Face of Shame

Love First: In the Face of Shame

Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?
John 8:1-5

Shame and its friends guilt and embarrassment are serious challenges to our lives. Shame has other names and faces—contempt, humiliation, remorse, stigma, dishonor, mortification, self-disgust. Feelings of shame are debilitating, keeping us from living full lives. Many times, the shame is secret, and it may not even be rooted in the truth or a real event, but it is real in the perception of the person who feels it. It can feel insurmountable.

In the story above, there are a couple of notable things. First, for all of their talk about the Law, the religious leaders had already disregarded it by only arresting the woman. The law actually required that both the woman and the man caught in adultery be stoned (see Leviticus 20:10 and Deuteronomy 22:22). This was trickery by the Pharisees to try to trap Jesus so they could turn him over to the Romans. Second, Jesus didn’t condemn the woman, but neither did he ignore or condone her sin. He told her to leave her life of sin.

Adultery may not be one of the life-altering sins we fall into, but there are others that cause us to harbor shame inside. Adultery by someone we know or love may cause us to feel shame. The challenges presented by that can make a choice to live life Love First really difficult. Can we open ourselves to deal with those challenges? Are we willing to choose to Love First?

Your Mission
Notice someone around you who seems to bear the brunt of criticism. Pray for them by name saying, “What can I do for [name] today?” Plan to respond with Love First.

Day 21 - Love First: In the Face of Rejection

Love First: In the Face of Rejection

Later Jesus was going about his business in Galilee. He didn't want to travel in Judea because the Jews there were looking for a chance to kill him. It was near the time of Tabernacles, a feast observed annually by the Jews. His brothers said, “Why don't you leave here and go up to the Feast so your disciples can get a good look at the works you do? No one who intends to be publicly known does everything behind the scenes. If you're serious about what you are doing, come out in the open and show the world.” His brothers were pushing him like this because they didn't believe in him either.”
John 7:1-7 (The Message)

Fear of rejection is a big deal. It always make the Top 10 lists. In fact, it's most often in the Top 5. Fear of rejection keeps us from being all that we can be. It keeps us from being our true selves. It causes others to feel a lack of confidence in us. While we can recognize it in ourselves, it can be difficult for others to pick up on. We may not realize that the person we work with and who seems so confident is suffering from a fear of rejection—fear of our rejection. Before you claim not to care what other people think, let's see some different things that are wrapped up in this challenge: exclusion, repudiation, dismissal, alienation renunciation, disappointment, deficiency, disapproval, and divorce.

The challenge of rejection hits us where it hurts. It feels like an attack on the very core of ourselves. It's one thing to face rejection from the people who don't know us. It's quite another to face rejection from those who we feel we're supposed to be able to count on to support us! That's a rejection that leaves us reeling. It also leaves most of us determined not to put ourselves in the position for that to ever happen again. We close ourselves off, and it is such a challenge for anyone to get through to us.

We are mostly familiar with the times in Jesus' life and ministry when the teaching and religious leaders of the Jews challenged him and tried to bring him down. But in the account above, it's Jesus' own brothers who didn't believe in him. They ridiculed him—their very own brother who was the Messiah. They didn't believe in him.

Choosing a life that puts Love First challenges those feelings of rejection. It challenges us not to close ourselves off from others. It challenges us to meet those feelings with Love First.

Your Mission
In your prayer time today, ask God to help you to keep from rejecting someone else and to look at them with the eyes of Love First.

Day 22 - Love First: In the Face of Feeling Inferior

Love First: In the Face of Feeling Inferior

...Near the Sheep Gate in Jerusalem there was a pool, in Hebrew called Bethesda, with five alcoves. Hundreds of sick people—blind, crippled, paralyzed—were in these alcoves. One man had been an invalid there for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him stretched out by the pool and knew how long he had been there, he said, "Do you want to get well?" The sick man said, "Sir, when the water is stirred, I don’t have anybody to put me in the pool. By the time I get there, somebody else is already in."
John 5:2-7 (The Message)

An inferiority complex is a general feeling of not being "up to the mark." Most of us accept without problem that we don’t have the financial acumen of Bill Gates, the brilliant intellect of Stephen Hawking, or the physical capabilities of Usain Bolt. True inferiority has more to do with us feeling like we should be as good as others and feeling like we're not and we don't know why.

I used to wonder why, in the story above, Jesus asked the man if he wanted to get well. That seems to me to be a no-brainer. But Jesus did ask him. The man’s response was not as straightforward as you’d expect. Instead of shouting, "YES!" the man gave an excuse—at least it seems like an excuse to me. The man had been an invalid for thirty-eight years! I don't know whether he’d been laying by the pool that long or not. But he'd been laying there long enough to feel defeated about ever getting in the pool. Yet he still lay there.

The challenge to overcome feelings of inferiority or the challenge to help someone else overcome those feelings is more difficult than it would seem. Other faces of inferiority include feeling inadequate, feeling weak, having deficits that seem insurmountable, feeling insufficient, and having feelings of shortcoming. One thing we can see is that you can't just wish the feelings away—this man had been down for thirty-eight years!

There are some who deal with these feelings by being domineering to prove that they are better than others. There are others who tried to fade into obscurity, continually telling themselves, "I'm not good enough" or "I'm worthless."

Choosing to live Love First in the face of feeling inferior is not without its challenges. Helping others to face those feelings of inferiority is not without its challenges. But Love First demands our action.

Your Mission
Think about those who are oppressed and put down around you. Find a way to be an advocate for someone who needs help today.

Day 23 - Love First: What's Wrong With Me?

Love First: What's Wrong With Me?

When Jesus got out of the boat, a man with an evil spirit came from the tombs to meet him. This man lived in the tombs, and no one could bind him any more, not even with a chain. For he had often been chained hand and foot, but he tore the chains apart and broke the irons on his feet. No one was strong enough to subdue him. Night and day among the tombs and in the hills he would cry out and cut himself with stones.
Mark 5:2-5

One of the life challenges many fear and have to face at some point is wondering whether (or realizing that) they or someone they love are damaged. Before you completely blow that off, let’s take a moment to look at the other faces of "damaged." Flawed, impaired, blemished, spoiled, distressed, crushed, fractured, fragmented, shattered, defective, abnormal, inadequate, injured. Does that make it seem a little more personal? Can you relate to feeling like any of those? Do you love someone who feels any of those?

Demon possession is pretty scary to even think about. The Exorcist has scared most of us more than once. Let’s not dwell on the demon possession part. Instead, let's focus on the visible signs that this person—this being—recognized that something was wrong with him. He would roam the tombs and hills night and day, crying out and cutting himself in his grief and devastation. Others were straight up afraid of him. We can pretty much guarantee that he didn't get many visits. But he was desperate for care, for attention...for love. The moment he saw Jesus, he fell on his knees and begged Jesus not to torture him. How damaged must he have been that the first thought that crossed his mind was being tortured?

Not many have been possessed by demons like this man, but many of us have felt inadequate to the point of quitting. We have felt flawed and defective. We know people who seem that way...maybe we have even asked ourselves, "What's wrong with them?" or said, "They're not normal."

But that isn't the end of it. Love First says that we respond—that we do something. In Jesus' case, he cast the demons out of the man. He showed the man compassion and love. He didn't worry about what others would say or do, he responded out of love first. It was challenging to the people who witnessed what happened. Verse 15 says: "When they came to Jesus, they saw the man who had been possessed by the legion of demons, sitting there, dressed and in his right mind; and they were afraid."

It will—and does—challenge us.

Your Mission
Meditate on today’s scripture passage. Could you show compassion without judging? What does it take to do so for you?

Day 24 - Love First: In the Face of Arrogance

Love First: In the Face of Arrogance

To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’

But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”
Luke 18:9-14

Arrogance wears a lot of faces—aloofness, disdain, egotism, pretension, vanity, conceit, haughtiness, self-importance, narcissism, pride. We have all been on both sides of it. We have been the one with too much pride or have held ourselves aloof when others needed us. We have also been the one who suffered because someone else’s ego was threatened or we have been put down in the wake of someone else’s vanity. Whichever side we were on, we wanted to be loved in spite of it. That’s not so wrong.

Let’s face it. When we read this account of the two men praying, it doesn’t take rocket science to see that the Pharisee didn’t really go to the temple to pray to God. He went to announce to everyone else how good he was and how he was the best at doing what he was supposed to do. This was not a modest brag. This was arrogance and all of its associated faces.

What strikes me is how the tax collector didn’t respond to what everyone in the temple could obviously hear. He was completely engaged in begging God for mercy and forgiveness for his sins. I’m not so sure I could have just ignored or tuned out the Pharisee, especially if I had been singled out like this man was.

The challenges to either overcoming arrogance in our own lives or trying to love someone in spite of their own arrogance can seem overwhelming. It can be very difficult to admit that we are wrong. Instead, we may act humble, but deep down inside, we still believe that we are right and everyone else is wrong. It can seem nearly hopeless to try to cope with someone who persists in putting us down so that they look good.

Jesus was very clear to those listening to him that the tax collector, rather than the Pharisee, went home justified before God. It would have been interesting to interview both of those men as they left the temple. I wonder what the Pharisee would have said and what his facial expressions would have conveyed? I wonder if the tax collector would have even stopped for the interview or if he would have said, “No comment,” and gone on his way.

Your Mission
Try to conquer arrogance and anger today with love. Let the crazy driver merge, give someone the seat on MARTA, or the like.

Day 25 - Love First: In the Face of Abandonment

Love First: In the Face of Abandonment

Now he [Jesus] had to go through Samaria. So he came to a town in Samaria called Sychar, near the plot of ground Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there, and Jesus, tired as he was from the journey, sat down by the well. It was about noon. When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “Will you give me a drink?” (His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.)
John 4:4-8 (the entire account is found in verses 1-38)

There are several remarkable things about this encounter. First, if you are familiar with the background, you know that Samaria was considered undesirable for the Jews. There were bad feelings and bad blood between Samaritans and Jews that had been going on for generations. Second, the time of day for this encounter was interesting. Women would come to draw water from the well in the morning and in the evening. This woman was there at noon—probably to avoid the other women. Third, it was against societal custom for a man, especially a Jewish man, to engage a Samaritan woman in conversation in a public place like the well.

Abandonment (and its other names: desertion, jilting, cast off, rejection, invalidation, withdrawal) is characterized by feeling like nobody cares about you, feeling like you’re all alone, feeling like you don’t matter. When you face this challenge, everyday chores can seem insurmountable.

Reading the account of the encounter reminds us that Jesus, and his gospel, is for every person, everywhere, in every circumstance. Living Love First means we represent Jesus to every single person we encounter—not just the ones we know. It means we are kind to the cashier who checks our grocery out. It means we smile and speak to the person in the dry cleaners. It means we are pleasant through the drive-through window. Love First means we are more concerned with the person we are interacting with than we are with ourselves.

When Love First becomes our way of life, the people we don’t know will be able to see Jesus in us. They may not understand. They may not respond well. They may ignore us. That doesn’t change how we live Love First. Because they might just store that away and think about it...and the next time we see them and respond to them in a Love First way, it will have made a difference in their life.

Your Mission
Many people feel they’ve been abandoned by a church. What is healthy way of communicating God’s love to such people?

Day 26 - Love First: Challenges

Love First: Challenges

...seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:33-34

Do not be afraid...for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. See your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will never fail, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there you heart will be also.
Luke 12:32-34

The top life challenges for our culture come about as a result of our fears (two totally different lists). The top life challenges we face (according to www.wanttoknow.info) are abandonment, arrogance, feeling damaged, inferiority, rejection, and shame. The top ten fears are failure, death, rejection, ridicule, loneliness, misery, disappointment, pain, uncertainty (fear of the unknown), and the loss of freedom.

Our challenges often become obstacles that keep us from doing the right thing, or moving forward, or getting ahead. We can become so focused on what challenges us that we lose sight of our goals. Consciously choosing to live a Love First life, which is God’s vision for us, means we must be prepared for the challenges that life (and Satan) will put in front of us. Worrying about them only takes up energy that is better used to love God and others.

As we enter this section of challenges, I wonder what stories in Scripture Jesus used to instruct his disciples in these issues. Because he did. We have the same Old Testament that they had to draw from as well as stories Jesus used in the New Testament. How might Jesus have used these stories?

Challenges may come in the form of people, circumstances, feelings, events, and even our own minds. Challenges require action on our part. Can you think about some challenges you may have already faced or that you can anticipate facing when you choose to live your life Love First? Perhaps those challenges go right along with the top life challenges we all face.

Choosing to Love First may require you to face those challenges and make some changes, but there will be benefits. Benefits that may well change your life forever.

Your Mission
What obstacles stand between you and God? Try to remove one issue, but be sure to replace it with something beneficial.

Day 27 - Love First: Those Who Aren’t Family and Friends

Love First: Those Who Aren;t Family and Friends

If you love me, keep my commands. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever—the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you. Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me. The one who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them.

...Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them. Anyone who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me.
John 14:15-21, 23

Nearly everyone wants to do the right thing for the right reason. That’s a feel-good kind of statement. But it’s no surprise to anyone that wanting to do the right thing is harder than it sounds. And wanting to do the right thing for the right reason is harder yet. There is no guarantee that doing the right thing for the right reason will automatically make others respect you or be kind to you or appreciate what you’re doing. That’s part of what makes it difficult to choose to practice Love First in every situation. We want others to appreciate what we’re doing for them.

Some people, though, will take what we do for them and turn it into something we didn’t mean. Why? They don’t know God, they don’t know us, and they don’t know we have committed to living our lives putting Love First. What kind of response does that call from within us? Anger? Disgust? Hurt? Bitterness? Those emotions can—if we let them—fester in our hearts and keep us from doing what is right for the right reason.

Our goal is to Love First...because Christ first loved us.

Your Mission
Who do you know could use some loving today? Well, offer them some in the form of encouragement, a hug, or assistance.

Day 28 - Love First: Family and Friends

Love First: Family and Friends

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Romans 12:9-18

Love First is a noble concept. It’s also one of those things that talks a lot easier than it lives. Quite frankly, it does seem that no one can push your buttons quite as quickly as someone you’re related to or who knows you really well. It’s then that this concept of Love First becomes challenging. This group of family and close friends that you already love? They are the ones most difficult to maintain the Love First way of life with. Family has seen you at your absolute best...and your absolute worst.

Most of us have learned how to pretend to love others—how to speak kindly, how to avoid hurting their feelings, and how to appear to take an interest in them. We may even be skilled in pretending to feel moved with compassion when we hear of others’ needs, or to become indignant when we learn of injustice. But God calls us to real and sincere love that goes far beyond pretense and politeness. Sincere love requires concentration and effort. It means helping others become better people. It demands our time, money, and personal involvement.

Today, we honor Martin Luther King, Jr. and the contributions he made with his lifestyle of Love First. He constantly challenged people to live better and more honestly. He encouraged others to view the people around them in a “love your neighbor” kind of way. He advocated peaceful community. Not everyone appreciated that—even if they were convinced he was right.

There are times when “going through the motions” can jump-start us into living in a Love First way. But it takes a conscious decision to respond to others in that way because Jesus loved us that way. We have to take ourselves out of the way and put our own wants aside. Simple? Yes. Easy? No way.

Your Mission
Who’s the most loving person in your family? Your most loving friend? Consider why they are the most loving toward you?

Day 29 - Love First: What Is Our Example?

Love First: What Is Our Example?

For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Ephesians 3:14-21

For years we’ve been taught to Love God. That’s a great goal. But we need to move from a Love-God kind of commitment to a Love-God-and-Others commitment. We’ve studied in depth the story of the Good Samaritan—and with good reason. That story teaches us about compassion, about paying attention to more than just what is directly in front of us and looking to the side to see those in need...and then doing something about it. We’ve imagined ourselves in each character’s role in the story—and that’s good, too. It helps us gain perspective in dealing with others. But what we haven’t overtly said is how this story is an example of Love First.

Obviously the priest and the Levite had priorities they felt were greater than the injured man in dire need on the side of the dangerous road. The Samaritan, in contrast, saw the value in Love First. His taking the time to attend to the man’s needs didn’t deter him from doing his daily business. His deeds of love and service weren't over-the-top, nor were they for show. It’s just what he did. He went on and took care of his business after seeing to the injured man’s needs.

Love First is just that. It’s paying attention in the normal course of our day or night—looking to the side to see if someone is in need. Most of the time, it’s right there in front of us; there’s not much looking for it required. It’s someone with car trouble on the side of the road in your neighborhood; it’s someone trying to do yard work ahead of incoming bad weather; it’s a runaway pet with frantic owners...it’s being aware of what is around us.

Love First makes a difference to one person at a time.

Your Mission
Spend some time today making an ongoing list citing every way God has shown love to you. Try to think both personally and broadly.

Day 30 - Love First: What Does It Mean?

Love First: What Does It Mean?

My dear children, let’s not just talk about love; let’s practice real love. This is the only way we’ll know we’re living truly, living in God’s reality. It’s also the way to shut down debilitating self-criticism, even when there is something to it. For God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves.
1 John 3:18-20 (The Message)

James Bryan Smith, in his Embracing the Love of God, wrote this profound thing: “God has created a world in which we are the ones who care for one another. To put it another way, God cares for us through one another.”

Francis Schaeffer, in his influential book The Mark of a Christian, wrote another profound thing: “Love—and the unity it attests to—is the mark Christ gave Christians to wear before the world. Only with this mark may the world know that Christians are indeed Christians and that Jesus was sent by the Father.”

Mother Teresa and her story of love for the poorest of the poor in India is well known. She observed the poorest people in India, she watched their lives, she observed their grief, she empathized with them, and she actively showed them the love of God. To her, love was only of use if it was put into and seen in action. She said things like: “Do ordinary things with extraordinary love...” and “You must give what will cost you something...”

She lived what she believed—love. She lived her calling and belief:

The fruit of silence is prayer.
The fruit of prayer is faith.
The fruit of faith is love.
The fruit of love is service.
The fruit of service is peace.

Love First demands action.

Your Mission
Make a sacrifice on behalf of another today. Do it without recognition, even if you have to do it anonymously.

Day 31 - And Then, There’s This...

And Then, There’s This...

“I will heal their waywardness and love them freely...”
Hosea 14:4(a)

A few months ago, we spent some time studying through the book of Hosea, and what we found there blew us away. We learned how Hosea told the entire nation of Israel that they needed to rethink their relationship with God. Up until that point, the relationship was along the lines of “I am your God; you are my people.” After Hosea, the relationship was more along the lines of “I am your Lover and I want you, Israel, for myself.” Prior to this, no one had dared to speak of God in those terms.

Scot McKnight says: “YHWH loves Israel the way a husband is to love his wife. Israel is to love YHWH with the same kind of love.” Hosea suggested to Israel that God had become heartsick over their unfaithfulness—much like a husband would feel over unfaithfulness in his wife. But in his heartsickness, YHWH pleaded with Israel to come back to him. We learned from Hosea that God loves his people. He loves them with a sacred love.

So when the Jesus Creed calls us to love God with everything we are—heart, soul, mind, and strength—we are called to form a love relationship with God that is totally sacred.

The term Abba is a personal and familiar form of “father” that implies the relationship of a much-loved child to their much-loved parent (see Romans 8:15 and Galatians 4:6). That’s the word that Jesus uses in the verses we are calling the Jesus Creed. That concept of Abba intensifies the significance of love. When we can put it together enough to understand our love for God as sacred and that he loves us with a sacred love, we come to want to honor that love with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength.

That sacred love impacts every single thing we do and say. This love transforms our lives and calls for our “all” of everything. This sacred love becomes evident in our speech, our actions, and our worship. It embodies Love First.

Your Mission
Every time a negative thought comes to mind, or a negative word or deed arises, make yourself recite Hosea 14:4a.

Day 32 - More About The Jesus Creed

More About The Jesus Creed

Hearing that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, the Pharisees got together. One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

Jesus replied: “’Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”
Matthew 22:34-40

Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.
Deuteronomy 6:4-5

Love your neighbor as yourself.
Leviticus 19:18(b)

One of the first things we notice when we read these verses is the question presented at the outset by the Pharisees: “Which is the greatest commandment?” Putting aside what we know about the way the religious leaders of Jesus’ time tried to trip him up over and over, notice what was actually being asked. The man—an expert in the law—asked a question concerning spiritual formation—in fact, this question addressed the very spiritual center of their faith.

What Jesus told the Pharisees hit them in a very personal way. As normal Jews (and certainly as religious leaders), their spiritual formation began with loving God with all their heart, soul, and strength. But in these verses, Jesus revises that command in these ways: loving others is added to loving God, and loving God is understood as following Jesus. It hits us in a very personal way, as well. Minister and author Rick Warren puts it like this: “Life minus love equals zero...The best use of life is love. The expression of love is time. The best time to love is now.”

Scot McKnight has used the phrase “Jesus Creed” to identify what Jesus told us to do for spiritual formation. The Jesus Creed is this: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all you mind. Love your neighbor as yourself.

Love First. It is what defines us.

Your Mission
In a global world, neighbor can mean a lot of things, but pray for the neighbors that live close to you and try to call them by name.

Day 33 - The Jesus Creed

The Jesus Creed

The terrorist attacks on 9/11/2001 changed our way of living and left us with many questions. Even if we could get satisfactory answers to our questions, our former way of life will never be restored. Never. Some of us now question things we would have calmly accepted in the past. That’s true in every arena. Things have changed dramatically in the religious landscape of America, as well, and we wonder if things will ever be the same as they used to. The answer is simple: They won’t.

But could things be better?

We have talked a great deal over the last few years about the concept of spiritual formation...with varying degrees of clarity. In his book The Jesus Creed, author Scot McKnight examines what it means to be spiritually formed.

It is simple.

It is profound.

Spiritual formation is about the love of God...and others. A spiritually formed person loves God and others. Spiritual formation begins with loving God...and loving others. Spiritual formation is about relationships—with God and with others.

Perhaps the Red Cross made the most notable and visible difference about loving and caring for others when they instituted a way to donate to disaster relief following the terrible earthquake and subsequent ruin of Haiti in 2010. All someone had to do to donate $10 to disaster relief for Haiti was to text the word “HAITI” to a short number on their mobile phone. The $10 was then added as a charge to their phone bill. How brilliant was that?! $43 million dollars was collected from mobile givers texting. Since then, for just about every natural disaster the world over, we can donate a small amount of money (small to us, perhaps, but HUGE for the effort) simply by texting a number on our mobile phone.

It wasn't the first time people gave generously to disaster relief. However, it changed who was doing the giving. It became up close and personal for a lot more people. Their hearts were pricked. They were motivated by love for mankind to do something.

Your Mission
If God asked you to love the unlovable, how would you begin? Do one thing to start seeing all people as God does, worthy of love.

Day 34 - Can We Agree on This?

Can We Agree on This?

Every question we have considered this week has the same theme. The answer is bound up in LOVE...why he died, the #1 commandment, why he came to Earth...

God’s vision for Jesus was to communicate this love to the world. Jesus faithfully lived under that vision. When we think of Jesus growing into his ministry...the entire journey was preparation for living out the vision God had for him.

We believe that God has a vision for his church...for this church family...and it is rooted in the vision God had for Jesus, his Son. It is the vision of Love. Love first. As his body, we live out his teachings and examples. But that means we must prepare to live under that vision of Love First.

There is a contemporary Christian song called “How He Loves,” written and performed by John Mark McMillan and covered by the David Crowder Band. Some of the lyrics include:

He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I Realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.
And oh, how He loves us so,
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us so.

The next few weeks will take us through what we need in order to live under Love First. It will be challenging, it may change our thoughts or actions, and there are spectacular benefits. What a gift awaits us as we strive toward God’s vision of Love First.

Your Mission
If love was the reason for living, how might your day look different? Try to live that way today in every way (conversation, traffic, etc.)

Day 35 - What Would You Say?

What Would You Say?

“As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. This is my command: Love each other.”
John 15:9-17

We would all agree that the journey to the cross and dying on the cross is certainly the unspeakable and inestimable sacrifice of Christ. If someone asked you why he did it—why did Christ die on the cross—what would you answer?

Think for a minute about all the songs you know or have heard that send the message that “love is the answer.” From early hymns to contemporary Christian songs, from Nat King Cole to Miguel and J. Cole, from the Beatles to Beyoncé...all sing songs that tell the message that love is what motivates all of us and is the answer to everything.

Do you believe that? What about that do you have trouble with? Do you live your life in that belief?

Would you agree that it is easier to love someone who loves you than it is to love someone who doesn’t care? What makes it easier? Does Jesus fit into that category for you?

Your Mission
“The opposite of love is not hate, but apathy.” Pray for a change in how you feel toward people who have wronged you.

Day 36 - What Do You Think?

What Do You Think?

Key Question:
If someone asked you what is absolutely the most important commandment (in Jesus’ eyes), what would you answer?

Hearing that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees, the Pharisees got together. One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”
Matthew 22:34-40

I’m a people-watcher...and people can be pretty interesting! If you watch and observe people long enough, you will discover what is important to them, and it won’t take long. If you spend time in conversation with them, their values always surface. They talk about what is important to them. In fact, their bank account, photo albums, Facebook timeline, Twitter feed...pretty much everything revolves around what is important to them. And you realize, these are some of the ways you reveal your values and priorities to others.

There are material things that are important to us, but more importantly, we have spiritual values. We want to be “right with God.” We want to live in obedience to his commands and purposes. We want God’s priorities. Jesus makes it clear that God does consider some commands as more important than all the others.

In this section of Scripture, Jesus quotes from Deuteronomy 6:5 and Leviticus 19:18. These two commandments are the building blocks—even the foundation—for all other commandments.

So let’s answer the key question:
If someone asked you what is absolutely the most important commandment (in Jesus’ eyes), what would you say?

Your Mission
Replace something important today in your routine (TV show, going to eat, etc.) with at least 30 minutes dedicated to serving God.